My lingering thought heading into 2020 continues to be: How beautiful would the world be if we all acted from a place of abundance and possibility?
So often, we operate from a sense of scarcity.
I saw it in a conversation with a friend on New Year’s Eve. She is unhappy in her job and comes home feeling drained every night after work. But she’s unsure what else she could do, fearful that her skills won’t translate. With no clear alternative presenting itself, she has chosen to stick it out in her current job. The most audacious resolution she felt comfortable speaking was, “Maybe I could find a better job this year.”
I felt torn up, because I heard how hard it was for her to believe in the possibility that she could find something better. And without that belief, she couldn’t even contemplate a commitment.
I also know without a doubt that this woman has more potential to achieve her goal than she imagines. My guess is that you do, too.
But how do you tap into that sense of abundance and possibility?
Instead of saying, “I don’t know if I could… [land a better job / learn to code / get that promotion]...”
Try asking yourself this question instead: What would I need to do or learn in order to say with 100% certainty that my goal is NOT possible?
I love this question for two reasons:
If you’re at 100% certainty that this goal simply isn’t possible, then you’ll know it’s time to let that sucker go! (Do a little dance as you hear that dead weight goin’ overboard.)
But if you’re not at 100% certainty, you know it’s time to shift from a passive stance -- waiting for the universe to tell you that your goal is achievable -- to an active stance, in which you’re tasked to prove its impossibility before you can let it go.
And taking an active stance requires... taking action! You’ll need to put on your most curious and resourceful researcher cap to start learning:
What does it take to achieve this goal? Who else has achieved it, and how did they do it?
What are some of the steps you’d need to take to pursue this goal, and what would be a good first step?
Who could you call for support, guidance, or an honest assessment of what’s within reach?
Follow the trail of learnings to see where it leads you.
You may very well accomplish your goal in the process! Or you might learn that although it’s possible to achieve your goal, it’s not a path you want to walk -- and finally let go of a wrong-fit goal that has been weighing you down. You may learn that this particular goal isn’t possible, and discern an alternative that’s even better.
Why is this so hard for us to do?
It’s simple: we want a guarantee. Before starting in on a goal, we want to know that we can achieve it. Failure and rejection are seriously scary, and in a society where time is scarce, it’s hard to contemplate committing the time we have to something that won’t work out.
So we file our goal under the “I don’t know” category, and wait for it to present itself as readily achievable.
The problem is, no goal does that for you.
Goals aren’t a one-and-done kind of thing. Goals - by definition - require multiple steps in order to achieve them. That’s why we call them goals, not actions. :)
But we don’t want to take action until we know for sure it’s worth taking. So we wait. And in doing so, we essentially guarantee that our goal will not be achieved.
It’s a sad cycle, folks! One I’ve found myself in more times than I can count. And that’s why I love this question. Because once we start assuming things are possible and taking action in that direction, we start spending less time ruminating, and more time building meaning into our lives.
Again, how beautiful would the world be if we all acted from a place of assuming that anything is possible?
Imagine what we could learn and do together this year if we did.
I'd love to hear from you in the comments: What would you learn or do if you believed anything were possible? Or what strategies or questions have helped you live with a greater sense of abundance and possibility?